PMS Stories II
Posted at 12:41 PM

Hello all! I assure you that I am still alive and kicking. Pardon my lack of posting this past week due to crampage, grogginess, and an overall falling behind on my schedule. In other words, I was a lazy bum and didn't feel like doing anything. But whatever. On to today's story:
It has come to my attention that a certain assistant principal, R. C. Duncan is promoted to the position of 'Principal' of my old high school. When I first heard the news, I couldn't help but worry about the future of my dearly beloved high school.
For a man who could hardly deal with the "bad" kids as assistant principal, how the hell could he possibly handle the job as Principal?

Back in the day when I was a high school student, I was a 'good' girl. I did all my hw before dinner, was nice to every teacher, yadda yadda. Senior year rolled along and I decided: to hell with the system and all its advocates. That was the year I began driving to school, made many foolish mistakes, loitered around without a hall pass and talked my way out of being sent back to class, got into a car wreck which totalled my Civic, was congradulated by the former principal of the school for being a good student, our house was broken into and our passports got stolen, waged a war with my moronic physics teacher, skipped class, and got sent to Duncan's office.

Well, that's not exactly how it happened. You see, from day 1 of my senior physics class, I decided that the class was worthless along with its teacher. The man who is unworthy of a name (partly because I forgot it), told us his life's story which was: he went to college, majored in biology, tried to get into med school, failed miserably, and is now teaching physics in high school and hates teenagers.
Due to the fact that he had spent two weeks on significant figures and handed us overly simplistic worksheets to do in class and to finish for homework, I decided I would not do his worksheets in class anymore and opted for my lit hw instead. The physics teacher came by and told me to "put the other work away and do the worksheet that I assigned"
Now, had I been a sophomore, or even a junior, I would have meekly replied "yes Mr. so and so, I'll do my physics now" but no, this teacher who hated teenagers had to deal with Cindy in her 4th year of high school.
I told him "No, this is absolute crap. This worksheet consists of punching numbers into the calculator and I refuse to do this now." I could tell that he was shocked. This was the beginning of the school year and being a teacher for the first time, he had never had to deal with insubordinance.
"Could you do this stuff if I gave you a pop quiz on it right now?" he demanded.
He was testing me I decided. He would not be able to produce a pop quiz this early into the school year so I responded "Yes, and I'd make a 100 on it too."
"Very well," he replied and stalked off. This was just the beginning of the havoc that I would wreak upon the physics teacher.

About halfway through the second semester, in the middle of a lecture, I asked the teacher to go to the restroom and never returned to class. You see, I had seen one of my best friends pass by and waved to me in the window of the door. When I got out of the class, I went with her to her spanish homeroom (aka advisement class for those of you who live on the west coast) and dallied there for the rest of my physics class.

Needless to say, my physics teacher promptly wrote me up to go see Duncan when I refused to tell him of my whereabouts of the previous day.

Walking to Duncan's office, I had already formulated my alibi. What Duncan did not know, was that I was Captain of the school's speech team, and was damned good at drama. I put on my best timid good girl face and stepped into his office.

"So your phyics teacher tells me you skipped over 25 minutes of his class yesterday, but you refused to tell him why,"

With my eyes to the floor, and my fingers figdeting in my lap, I spoke in my timid voice "Well, it was really embarassing, so I really didn't want to explain this to him, but I never thought he'd send me here!"

Duncan stared at me.

"I had... well... feminine issues..."

Education-bound women, listen up. These two words, "feminine issues" will bail you out of almost any situation short of man slaughter. I kid you not. It is the trump card of all trump cards.

The remaining time in Duncan's office went like this:

"Well, I'm sorry your physics teacher had to send you up to me for this kind of thing. You look like a good, innocent student and I'd hate to see you with the rotten ones, so you may go now. Just try not to let it happen again!"

Of Wockys & Makeovers
Posted at 03:03 PM

*Note: All links open in new window and some pages may take a while to load due to slow Neopets servers!*
I logged onto my neopets account the other day (yes, I know, I'm one of those neopets dorks), to discover that my darling >LukeSkyWocker had been given a makeover! I was surprised and appalled! Most of his poses got uglier, esp the sick/sneezing pose. See for yourself. Images are courtesy of >Neocolours.co.uk

LukeSkyWocker, is displaying the new wocky body style in the color "fire" while >Lady_Whimsical, is displaying the old wocky body style in the color "striped".

While I'm at it, I might as well show you my other neopets, >Lord_Malystrix the Island Cybunny and >WaterS0ng the Peophin! I plan on painting WaterS0ng with a baby paint brush whenever I can get my hands on one. What do you all think?

I'm Still Mad at You
Posted at 10:03 AM

Dear Colin,

I'm still mad at you. Your addiction to D&D worries me more than your mother. Trying to get you to quit is harder than asking a chain smoker of 20 years to quit. At least there's Nicorette for smokers.

Love,
Cindy

PS. It's for your own good you know :P

The Easter Egg Hunt!
Posted at 11:43 AM

Ha! Since no one has emailed me to claim their prize, I guess I won't have to make one. lol.

When All Else Fails
Posted at 09:23 AM

For the longest time, my Internet Explorer was broken. My poor little new computer was overrun and infested with spyware and other evil things. It caused my internet explorer to not allow me to view certain flash movies (like the end of the world flash). I was not able to check my grades or download lecture slides off WebCT.

But still, out of laziness and familiarity, I continued to use IE. But still, more and more websites began to show up as "the page cannot be displayed. Try using My Search to find out more about these topics of interest: Home, Entertainment, Media, Culture, What Your Grandma Was Doing At Age 25, etc." However, the day I could not get to www.webassign.net to do my physics homework (remember, I go to gatech, so everything is either on a computer or on the web!) was the day I decided to put IE into retirement and looked to Mozilla or Opera as alternatives. After downloading both programs, I hadn't fully given up hope on Internet Explorer yet. I would make some final, serious changes (call them my acts of desperation to save IE). I went into my control panel and started uninstalling random programs. Then I went into the Program Files folder and my Windows folder and started deleting a whole bunch of things that looked suspicious.

1 hour and 42 minutes later, I had cleared up 139 megabytes of space on my compy.

And my IE was working properly again!

*The only drawback to these drastic actions is the fact that every time I turn on my computer, it will boot up with a pop-up message telling me that Image.dll could not be found. But it's a small price to pay for having one's IE working properly, is it not?

Bio1520 is the Bane of Mother Nature
Posted at 10:16 PM

This week was the very last week. I will never have to go to another Organismal Biology Lab ever again. What makes this class so detestable?

Call us murderers. From day 1 of lab, we've killed just about every living thing in all kingdoms' phyla. We grew "lawns" of bacteria of different types. Then we poured various acids and bases over them to see how much of them would die. Then we obtained clusters of various algae, and sliced them up to examine their insides under a microscope. The mosses, liverworts, and ferns befell the same fate. In fact, ferns were SO interesting, we scraped off their little reproductive structures and cut them open to examine that as well! Then came the plants. We pried and prodded evergreen genitalia, we plucked flowers and ripped them apart to count the number of anthers. We breezed through the fungi, and decapitated several dozen mushrooms.

Lastly, came Kindom Animalia. We smooshed several paramecium in little glass slides. We fed them colored food to look at its decomposition in the creature's body. We poked at the little defenseless flatworms with vinegar. We shined bright lights in their poor little primitive eye spots. We fished strands of round worms out of smelly jars of formaldehyde to cut them open and look at their fake coeloms. Note: these are the same round worms that dwell in human intestines, and crawl of out human rears to deposit their eggs. We cracked open clams, marinated in formaldehyde, to examine their foot. The crayfish had their exoskeletons disassembled and their feathery gills noted. We abortioned baby chicks.

Then we got to the fetal pig. We had to work on the pig for a total of 3 weeks. I watched the juices from the pig turn from a slight peach, to a muted rust, to finally a cardboard brown. We had no refrigerators to keep 100 some odd semi-dissected fetal pigs in, so we just sealed them up in zip lock baggies and put them in various cabinets and drawers in the lab room. By the end of that week, every single drawer and cabinet contained a fetal pig.

I am glad that I will never have to take another biology class again.
Note: I am not responsible for any pictures you may find offensive, because that's what those animals really look like when you take a biology class in college.

The Time I Lied to a Cop
Posted at 04:26 PM

There's nothing like an oncoming bio test that makes you want to not study and blog instead!

Once upon a time in Gainsville, Florida, when my daddy was a grad student at the University of Florida, the housing people decided to deny him housing in one of their apartments in his last year. So, my daddy decided it was time to move to another apartment about a block down the street from our old apartment.

During the moving process, my parents didn't want me getting in the way, so they dropped me off with our next door neighbors at the old apartment while they took trips moving everything into our new apartment. Thinking it would only take my parents a few hours to finish moving, I obediently allowed my mischievous 4-year-old self to be baby-sat for at the nice nieghbor's apartment.

The morning passed by, then noon, then afternoon. By now, I was bored out of my brains. A day is a VERY long time for a little kid. It was around this time that my care-taker asked if I wanted to go to the neighborhood playground. I gleefully agreed and dashed outside to the playground. I played for about a half hour before I got bored again. My care-taker went inside for a bit and told me to be good.

It was also about this time that I began to wonder what was taking my mommy and daddy so long to move into our new apartment. Thinking that if it took only 5 minutes to get from our old apartment to our new apartment by car, I could aslo get from our old apartment to our new apartment in a short amount of time. So off I went, out the playground, and out the nieghborhood. To the sidewalk I went, and around the corner. Our new apartment was farther away than I thought! Up to the pedestrian cross walk I went, and crossed the street. Over hill and under dale. At last I reached the entrance to our new apartment! But alas! A policeman was finally able to track me down!

The police parked right next to the sidewalk and a big, fat, scary looking policeman in mysterious dark sunglasses stepped out of the car. I was in terrible horrible trouble! Perhaps I broke a speeding law! Perhaps I wasn't supposed to run across the cross walk? Perhaps they were going to put me in jail for cutting Billy Jean's hair with the teacher's grown-up scissors! By now, I had completely forgotten why I was here, and what caused me to walk all the way over here.

So when the big policeman sqatted down to my height, looked me in the eye, and asked me, "Are you lost, little girl? And where are your parents?" I simply stared at him in shock. The only truthful thing I said to him was in response to the first question.

"No," I squeaked. Without thinking, words just began to tumble out of my mouth before I even realized I was just making up stories.

"Me and my daddy were... running... and he said 'I bet you can't get home before me!' and I said 'I bet I can!' So we ran and ran and so he ran home before me."

Right at that moment, my dad pulls into the new apartment entrance and spotted me talking to the cop. He dashes out and says "Thank goodness you found her!" I quickly hopped into the back seat of the car and peeked out the window, looking at the cop fearfully.

The cop gives my father a stern look.

"Mister, were you and your daughter running?"

Beyond Obsession
Posted at 12:38 AM

It's been almost a year since my high school senior prom. I cannot begin to stress enough how hectic the pre-prom planning and organization was. Everyone wants their prom to be perfect. Everyone wants their prom to be the bestest best prom ever. The reality is, while some people have a blast, others don't get their expectations met. For me, it was was a time of golden opportunity. Being a firm believer in the carpe diem philosophy, and an obsessive fanatic of the tv show, Alias, (which is Sunday nights, 9-10 pm EST btw), I decided to ask Mr. David Anders, the guy that plays the elusive Mr. Sark, on Alias, to prom. Yes, you read that correctly, I asked a man whom I've never met to my high school senior prom.
It began, quite innocently enough, when I was searching for Alias fan sites on the internet. This was still back in the day when Alias was not quite so popular. However, David Anders has a brother who knows his html. And that's how I came across the David Anders Official Website.
Within a week, I had obtained his email, his mailing address, and his brother's cell phone #. I wrote him the following email:

Dear Mr. David Anders,
My name is Cindy and I am a high school senior
attending --- . I'm guessing
you're wondering why an 18-year old girl would be
emailing you. Well, I’ll cut to the chase. I would
be honored and forever grateful if you would go to my
school’s senior prom with me. I know that you
probably have people asking you to marry them all
the time, and I know you have countless other
fan girls after you daily. However, I am an
optimist waiting for my miracle :) Besides, I'm not
that young, we're only 3 years apart. I’ve been
watching Alias ever since the X-Files ended. At
first, the only thing that got me hooked was Jennifer
Garner’s role as a kick-butt woman with power. Then
you showed up in the middle of the first season as the
mysterious Mr. Sark. Since then, you’ve caught my
eye. I’ve been intrigued by
you because you seem to be completely different from
the spy agent you play on television (yes I’ve done my
research, no I’m not stalking you), than the you in
real life. If you went to prom with me, what would be
better than getting to know you in person? Our
school’s prom is going to be held at the Atlanta
Fernbank Museum this year on Saturday, May 3rd
(www.fernbank.edu) and I would be the luckiest girl on
earth to spend an evening of food, music, and dancing
with a handsome, talented, and intelligent, man.
I know you are a busy man, and I will understand
if you are unable to come.
Please reply by Friday, April 11th if you are
able/unable to be my prom date.
Yours truly,
Cindy

To which he replied a few days later:

Cindy
Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to you about your
Prom. They keep me very busy with this shooting schedule as well as
appearances. Although, I am very flattered by your invitation, I won't
be able to accompany you to your high school prom. I do hope you
understand. I know that you will have a wonderful prom experience.
Again thanks for the invitation, and I will have my brother send you
out
an autographed picture. Sorry I can't come out in person. Take care
and have a great prom.

Sincerely,

David Anders


-----Original Message-----
From: Cindy [mailto:-----------]
Sent: Monday, April 07, 2003 12:59 PM
To: david@davidanders.com
Subject: Yes? No? Maybe so?

He never did send me that autographed picture btw.
What prompted this sudden flood of high school nostalgia? I was randomly looking up stuff on google, and came across the David Anders site again. I read this personal note from David to his fans and this paragraph caught my eye:

"I would like to end this fine note with an additional acknowledgment of the tremendous amount of well-wishes, congratulations, prom invitations, and even marriage proposals, I have received over the past year. It is quite overwhelming...but appreciated. I feel the love, and I want you to know that it is important to me."

::Stress::
Posted at 10:15 AM

Today is the day I have to sign up for classes for next semester, despite the fact that my registration period begins at 2:20, right in the middle of my history lecture. Today is also the day I have to fight my way to get parking for next semester. Today is also the day I have the last Biology Lab exam of this semester.

*stress* *stress* *stress*

Food for Thought
Posted at 03:58 PM

"Every nation's terrorist is some other nation's hero fighting for a just cause"

-My history professor

Kittens, Cancer, and Masturbation
Posted at 01:13 PM

It has come to my attention, that frequent ejaculations may lead to a reduced risk of prostate cancer.

However, if this were true, and if God were to kill a kitten every time some desperate guy were to masturbate, think of the millions of kittens killed!

But all you desperate guys out there would say: but it's PROSTATE cancer! It'd kill us! I'd rather a kitten die!

Think of it this way: * note: "->" denotes "lead to"

1. If Masturbation -> Ejaculation (which) may/may not = reduced risk of prostate cancer -> not dying of prostate cancer , and

2. Masturbation = Angering God -> dead kittens, but

3. Dead kittens -> increased diseases floating about + increased bacteria -> uncleanliness -> death and disease for mankind, then

4. If mankind does not die of prostate cancer -> mankind will live -> increased chances of virus/cancer/aging -> death!

For those of you that don't follow: A reduced risk of prostate cancer does not increase the amount of life you have, because eventually, you will die of something! So spare those poor little baby kittens! Besides, a kitten's cuteness is > desperate masturbating guys.

Crazy Bored People
Posted at 02:49 PM

Ever since I got this handy Site Meter counter on this blog, I have been infinetly entertained by the random things people have typed into search engines to find my site.

From Google.com:
"soggy things"
"apartments gainsville florida"
"sweet screen names"
"patrick seitz"
"rawr definition"
"boot up image.dll"

From Search.earthlink.net:
"mosses and ferns insides"

From AOLsearch.com:
"gainsville apartments"
"apartment gainsville"

And last, but most amusing, from Websearch.cs.com:
"pictures of a dissected pigeon"

Azumanga Daioh!
Posted at 10:19 AM

The wallpaper:


For those of you that watch it, this wallpaper was made from episodes 21 & 24 of the Azumanga Daioh series. It features Sasaki's cute little Irimote mountain cat, Maya!

Finals are Fast Approaching
Posted at 10:26 AM

Surgeon General Warning: Due to finals encroaching on Cindy's sanity, there may be a shortage of tabulas posts.

Fontaholics Anonymous
Posted at 03:52 PM

Alright. I'll admit it. I am a fontaholic. I get more new fonts than I get new shoes. But ever since the Great Computer Reformatting, I lost my vast empire of a font collection. It was quite sad.

I first realized I had a problem when my family and I went to Disney world in Orlando, Florida. We passed by a large, brightly colored banner that read "Parade of Characters" and immediately, I thought to myself: That's the "Party" font, size 1000. It only got worse from then on.

Should I type my cover page for my english paper in the cutesy Jester font, or should I go for the more elegant Scriptina? Do I want these birthday invitations printed out using the nice, practical Georgia font, or the fancy-yet-tasteful Vivladi font?

When I read books in my leisure time, I would pick the ones with the most interesting fonts. Sure you're not supposed to judge a book by its cover, but no one ever said not to judge one by its cover font! Using this method, I came across a great amount of wonderful literature such as the His Dark Materials trilogy (the hardcover edition), Joanne Harris's Five Quarters of the Orange and Chocolat. Though sometimes I am mistaken as Mitch Albom's the five people you meet in heaven was a terrific book too.

But I digress. The point of this post is, I am missing a dearly beloved font and I forgot what it was called. It was a very ornate and flowery dingbat. The capital "A" was a very scripty, very pretty pedestal with a bunch of fruit on top. I know for a fact that it had the letters "DF" in its font name. If anyone has any idea what font this is, PLEASE reply to this post and let me know! I would greatly appreciate it :)

Materialistic Pettiness
Posted at 01:22 PM

I just don't understand you people and your drives for these petty, materialistic things. I really don't.

Just When Summer Arrives
Posted at 04:51 PM

5 words for you:



My

mother

wrecked

my

car

.